What ‘Incredible India’ advertisements don’t show you.

This year, we will be celebrating India’s 70th year of Independence. Woo Hoo! India tops the list of up-and-coming economies. It also stands 22nd on the list of best countries to live in for 2016. That’s not bad at all!

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Way to go India!

India is an incredible country! We have the freedom to pursue what we wish to; We have ample resources and are a powerhouse of talent! But if we need to improve, we must face reality. So let us reflect on the many things that ‘Incredible India’ advertisements fail to cover:

  1. Treatment of Women: Many of our men love women. So much so, that they call out to every woman walking down the street. Women mistake this for eve-teasing. Some men even take the liberty of making the first move without the woman’s consent. It’s generally called rape. But guys, if you’re accused of it, don’t worry; You can get away with it easily in India!

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    We managed to get 3 staring men in one picture!
  2. Homophobia: What I love about this country is the empathy that we have towards the LGBT community. It’s amazing how “gay” is an abuse more than a sexual preference. I love to hear statements like, “Homosexuality is a bad addiction”, or “Homosexuality is against Indian culture, against nature and against science”. Especially from prominent public figures. Sir, you are living examples of how stupid people get famous!
  3. Section 294 of the Indian Penal Code: This act states that causing annoyance to others through “obscene acts” is a criminal offence with a punishment of imprisonment up to 3 months or a fine, or both. (Source: Wikipedia; Because I wasn’t taught about this in school). Obscenity is subjective. Like in India, celebrating Valentine’s Day is considered obscene but urinating on the street is a feast to the eyes.

  4. Traffic: Indians have great civic sense. They will always drive on high beam because they know for sure that their fellow drivers cannot see the oncoming car. They also love to live life on the edge. For example, pedestrians will always walk in the middle of the street and make sure that they don’t use the zebra crossing because what’s the point anyway? There’s still a good chance of them getting run over!
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    Check out the man trying to overtake all the big cars on his moped!

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    This is the minimum traffic you’ll see at any given time on Indian roads.
  5. Roads: Roads in India are marvellous, to say the least. The reason we don’t have a Disney Land here is because you can experience all their roller coasters on your way to work everyday.

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    The road I’m standing on is not a by-lane. It is an actual main road.
  6. Cleanliness: Prime Minister Modi is putting in a lot of effort to make India a cleaner place with the whole ‘Swacch Bharat’ scheme. Unfortunately, it seems like urinating and defecating on streets is pleasurable. A very bright idea is to dispose the waste of an entire 10 km radius right outside the 10 km radius so that you can see what your neighbour threw out in their garbage the previous night!

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    Dump yard in the heart of a residential locality!
  7. Concern for Co-passengers: We just love our co-passengers in public transport. Inconveniencing them gives us immense joy. Everyone knows that mobile phone signals are not up to the mark in moving trains but we will make sure to make calls and shout “Hello Hello Hello” multiple times in a modulated tone of voice. In flights, we automatically assume that our air-hostesses are the in-flight entertainment and try to flirt with them in a highly sophisticated manner. We also dislike waiting until the plane has come to a complete halt before we get up to get our cabin baggage because if we save these 2 minutes we will be able to conquer the world.
  8. Value for Time: In India, the thing we respect most after women is time. We always reach our professional set up in time (for lunch). Our boss never lies to us saying that the meeting will begin at 9:30 while it actually begins at 11:00. We also never have excuses like, “My grandmother’s, uncle’s, sister’s, husband’s nephew’s child fell ill so I went to the hospital”, for being late.
  9. Respect for others’ choices: We have utmost respect for other people’s life choices. Your neighbor will always see you with a friend of the opposite gender and judge your character. If you’ve decided to go clubbing in a short dress, be prepared to be called a slut. Your parents’ biggest concern when you decide to study arts instead of medicine and engineering will be the society’s judgement.IMG_1217
  10. Love for Architecture: If you’ve ever been to a historical monument in India, you would’ve noticed how the walls are filled with intricate calligraphy – ‘Rahul loves Priya’, ‘Santosh loves Janaki’, etc. We Indians believe that carving your girl friend/ boy friend’s name on a heritage building makes you the Shah Jahan of your time because building a marble monument for your love is so old-fashioned!
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    The same children who scribble on walls at home grow up to do this on monuments.

    This blog is in collaboration with Wrap Cupid, an e-commerce website that houses a range of very interesting occasion-inspired clothing. This time, I’m wearing my 3 favourite Independence Day inspired T-shirts. If you like them, go ahead and click on these links to buy them!

  11. Red India T-shirt
  12. Grey ‘I’m India’ T-shirt
  13. M.S Dhoni Vest

I hope this Independence Day you all make a resolution to stop peeing on streets and behave like civilised humans, if you don’t already!

Cheers,

Ajab!

 

Photography by Vamsi Patchipulusu| 
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Copyright 2016| Seersucker Over Velvet| All Rights Reserved

 

 

3 comments on “What ‘Incredible India’ advertisements don’t show you.

  1. Ha ha so true! And so many of these apply to some of the neighboring countries as well! While some of these things are regularly talked about in the media, what pisses me off most is the high beam at night. It’s surprising how there is absolutely no discussion about this and no awareness to stop this. :/

    Like

  2. Ajab, after reading the post, many would rethink the way we look at civic sense. A heady sense of responsibility & respect to others is the dire need. Intriguing & hard-hitting points listed. Good piece of work!

    Like

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